Tuesday, April 19, 2011

bits and pieces

Lots of interesting (or not so interesting) things going on around here lately.

It is spring break, after all.

I met with my dad and a financial adviser this morning. While we were walking through my dad's office, he introduced me to some of the people he works with (it has been years since I've been at his office). One of them, upon hearing that I'm on spring break, asked me, in all seriousness, what school I go to. Ha! I turned thirty on Saturday! And he thought I attended school, rather than teach it!

Meeting with financial advisers makes my eyes glaze over. I maintained eye contact, but I'm not sure if my brain really followed much that was said. He kept asking if I had any questions. Um, yes, but I can't think of them when you are talking so fast about things I really don't understand. Can't you just tell me what the best path to take is? Isn't that why you are called an "adviser"?

Sweet hubby helped me do some more yard work yesterday afternoon. We are tackling the vine situation. We have invasive brambles on the left side of the yard, along the fence, all the way back. We have honeysuckle all over the place on the right. And at the back, and on some of the trees, we have ivy. And they have taken over. It is quite satisfying to give a mighty tug and have thirty feet or so of vines shake loose from the top of a tree. It is scary to see gigantic newt-lizard-creatures moving about underneath and wonder whether snakes are living in my backyard.

At a (university) church leadership meeting last night, we finally had the opportunity to voice the concern that students are overextended, over-committed, and overwhelmed when they are asked to step up into leadership roles. I think the pastor might have actually heard what we were saying, and might be willing to work on his organizational skills and do more follow-up of ideas, rather than leaving all the follow-up to students. I hope it happens, because the ministry could turn into something much bigger with a little bit more follow-up.

The flowers from my birthday party make me smile every time I see them. We'll be eating leftovers for weeks. I'm taking leftovers to Easter dinner.

I'm not supposed to run for another week. I'm actually feeling ready to start exercising again, and like my clothes are getting tight. I miss spending time with my running buddy, too.

Roommate (even though she moved back out already) is leaving for Korea at the end of the month. I'm gonna miss her. Summer is hard for me, since so many of my close friends are in school. I don't like to be far away from my friends for long. Unless I'm the one doing the leaving. Then it is ok. I'm obviously very fair.

And this part is sad, not joking.

A kid from my (morning) church committed suicide last week. He was reported missing on Thursday, and found on Friday. I didn't know him very well, but I've been really upset about the whole situation. I think it has gotten me stirred up because of the recent situation with my friends, one who was threatening suicide, committing self harm, and threatening harm to others. This time, I am on the outside, looking in, and wondering about all of the what-ifs. What if someone had known the depths of his pain? What if someone had called the cops on him? What if his dad hadn't been in India when it happened? What if? What it? What if?

What it keeps coming back to, for me, is the question....What if it had been my friend? What if I was in the middle of grieving the loss of my close friend, who I had watched struggle with her own personal history, struggle with opening up in counseling, struggle with the decision to take antidepressants, struggle with the side effects of those medications?

As I was not a close friend of the family, what I feel comfortable doing for them is praying. I pray that they feel God's presence, that they continue to grow in their faith, that they feel lifted up by the friends and family who surround them, that they are given the strength to put one foot in front of the other each day, that their basic needs be met during the worst of their grief, and on and on and on. And I remember them often throughout the day, and the pain they must be experiencing, and I selfishly praise the Good Lord that my friend was able to find some help here on earth. And that's where I am today.

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