I guess it's been a while.
I've been....angry. Emotional. I'm blaming the hormones and my doctor's office. They get me so riled up, it is ridiculous. After my appointment tomorrow, sweet hubby and I are going to evaluate whether it is time to find a different practice or not.
I have been focused on getting the results back from some prenatal testing, with the problem that the doctor's office doesn't seem to want to schedule a review of the results. It's annoying to have to call them all the time, have them not return my calls, and to give me conflicting information to what the doctors say during my appointments. It has been clouding what should be a joyous and exciting and happy season for me, because we are finally starting to make this pregnancy public and having to worry worry worry at the same time. (Regardless of the testing results, we are keeping the baby -- there is a high chance of Down syndrome -- which is not what we are hoping for, but we'll accept if it is what God is planning for our lives.)
Things I've been doing to not focus on how much I dislike the doctor's office right now:
1. Shopping! Oh, shopping! If only I actually had the money to support my shopping habit! I just ordered a bunch of things online, and I'm sure most of them will have to go back, either because of budget or because of fit. A very sweet friend of mine sent me a box of her maternity clothes, but our bodies are very different shapes. There are several tops that will work (for now, at least), but most of the pants are way too tight for me -- so I'm trying to find a couple good pairs of khakis that I can wear to school, a pair of jeans, and some shorts, since summer here is HOT.
2. Shopping! Yes, more shopping. My mama took me shopping on Friday (school holiday!) with my sister, and they helped me pick out a couple of nice dresses, a skirt, and some tops that are a little more my style/color. The best part? My mama was paying! I get to keep these, for sure, because most of them I tried on with the belly (what an experience!) and because they were gifts.
3. Volunteering for a local production of the Vagina Monologues. Performed around Valentine's day, this show is often used to help raise awareness of women's issues. The local university production is a fundraiser/volunteer recruiter for a sexual trauma service group in town. They provide free counseling for victims of sexual abuse or rape, visit victims in the hospital to walk them through the process, and do so much more in our community. It was encouraging to see a larger number of male audience members this year than two years ago. It gives me hope that attitudes towards women are changing, albeit slowly.
4. Watching "Make it or Break it" on Netflix. Oh, ABC family, you know just how to rope me in -- a little bit of high school drama, a little bit of gymnastics fun, and, thank you Netflix, no commercials.
5. Finally cleaning up the Christmas mess. This means clearing off the dining room table, which will next be set up as a sewing station. New pants? Must be hemmed. New skirts? Must be hemmed. And there is also the fabric and patterns that I splurged on in January, hoping to be inspired to make myself some of my own maternity clothes....I hope I get more inspired soon, soon, soon! I won't be able to make my before-March goal unless I get moving.
6. Telling people, one by one, about the baby! This is probably my favorite, because we've been married for a while (almost 7 years) and this is our first baby. I am LOVING people's reactions, their screams of delight, their impulse hugs, and the smiles on their faces. It is, I think, the BEST distraction of all.