my pink life, mi vida rosada

8 days away from summer vacation waiting for the appraisal-man to come and appraise the property next door, so that i can discuss finances with the finance man on thursday and hopefully make an offer on the property by the end of next week missing the beach after a wonderful, relaxing, fun weekend with my family watching my alien stomach move like crazy as Peanut dances on the inside sad that the smoothie-blender-cup got stuck in the smoothie-blender-motor-base, so both are stuck in the fridge until sweet hubby gets home from getting some allergy shots (and finishing his work day, too) excited to see sweet hubby's boss during career day at my school tomorrow, talking to my students about her job as an interpreter, and hopefully in spanish hopeful that sweet hubby will remember to buy a new gallon of paint for Peanut's room so that my little sister can paint the room (again) on friday, since the second gallon was originally left untinted and got mixed with the first ...

And every one of them.... will be soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo long. But I can put one more finger down after each one of them, starting tomorrow. This is cause for celebration!

On the progress front. I can't seem to get unstuck from the hurt of the way the whole situation at school with changing grade levels was handled. I don't really want to leave my job for a whole year, or for forever, either. I don't really want to stay at a job where I don't trust my boss, either. I'm zero degrees closer to making a decision. I don't seem any closer to forgiveness, either, although I think that it is probably necessary (and probably, eventually, the better choice). I still have mean thoughts in my heart and my head -- especially a strong desire for the teacher/principal to experience great failure with this "experiment" that they are forcing me to be a part of. Not that I want my part to be a failure -- I just want that teacher to experience failure so great that she doesn't recover from it easily. I don't think it is a good thing for me to want bad things for other people. I don't WANT to want bad things for...

There was a cookout for teachers during our lunch today -- I ate the lunch sweet hubby had packed for me, anyway, since I don't eat hamburgers or hot dogs (I eat turkey burgers, or chicken burgers, or chicken-dogs, but no red meat or pork products). The insurance/retirement guy was there with ice cream sundaes for all of us -- I guess I met with him in either december or january, and he didn't know I am expecting a baby! He was a little bit surprised. I can't remember exactly when I met with him, but I might not have even known I was pregnant yet! It blows my mind how much has changed in the past six months! In a couple of weeks, I'll meet with a financial adviser to talk about the feasibility of taking long-term child care leave after maternity leave in the fall. I'm sure it will depend partly on me learning to stick to a budget, and partly on how many hours sweet hubby works this summer and fall (while I'm out on maternity leave), and partly on a little...

I have options! I feel like there is a light at the end of a dark and stressful tunnel! I met with the HR lady today about maternity leave, and she presented me with an option of which I had previously been unaware. As you know, I've been moved to a different grade level for next year, taking the place of the teacher who requested to move into my current spot, and who is known to not actually use appropriate materials for immersion in her classroom, and also being required to work hand in hand with this teacher to let her "help" me adjust to the new grade level at the same time as I'm more concerned with spending time with my baby girl. I've been very upset about it. Many sleepless nights, some pleas for help and assistance, grudging enlistment of another immersion teacher at my school (and perhaps forthcoming another teacher at a different school), lots of tears, a conference with the director of the immersion program, more tears....and now I finally feel...

And I'm not just talking about my biological parents, or sweet hubby's, or our godparents, either. I'm talking about the parents of my kids at school. (They are mine. I claim them. As much as they drive me crazy, drive each other crazy, drive other teachers crazy....they are mine.) They organized a baby shower at school so that my kids could help me celebrate Peanut. There was pizza and cake and games and candy prizes and picture taking and a generous gift card, too. It was loud and the kids were silly, but I think they were happy, too. Now, if only the printer would print the thank you notes I've been drafting....

still hoping the situation at school will resolve itself soon, although it seems that maybe i need to just get used to the idea of moving grade levels at the same time i have my first baby. watching bad tv since the internet connection was too slow for netflix. feeling the baby kick. not excited about teaching tomorrow after three days of state testing. also hoping i have enough activities planned for our wacky schedule at school tomorrow. thinking the baby shower my students are having for me tomorrow will be cute. covered in cat hair from my furry sweet kitty. constantly checking my email in hopes of good news (i.e. the news that i won't actually be changing grade levels next year) but not really receiving the news i want. enjoying a peanut-butter-fudge milkshake thinking that it is bedtime, but with sweet hubby out for the night, it's hard to get myself in bed on time just about 26 weeks pregnant and totally unable to control my emotions glad sweet hubb...

It was a rough week. The decision was made on Wednesday. I didn't sleep more than three hours that night. I cried a lot, prayed a little, wrote a little, looked up fun pictures to recreate for Peanut's nursery (to try to distract myself). After I arrived at school on Thursday, I cried some more. Thursday afternoon, I cried some more. After I got home from school, I wrote an email detailing my upset to my principal. I sent it to my partner teacher for her opinion, and she said "Don't send it. Don't burn bridges right now." Good thing I didn't listen to sweet hubby, who thought it was excellent and should be sent right away. Thursday evening, I went out to supper with sweet hubby and the movie night girls -- all of whom had been warned ahead of time not to ask me about school. We had plenty of other things to talk about, and a good time was had by all. I didn't sleep much again on Thursday night, but I did start to find some gems. T...

Not that it will do me much good, because there isn't really anything I can do about it. But I need to vent a little bit, and so I'm going to get started. The principal of my school just screwed me over because the 2nd grade teacher wanted something she shouldn't have been able to have. What did she want? My 3rd grade position. I have many concerns about this teacher's teaching practices, especially as they are related to teaching immersion, and also related to her ability to have students actually learn math and science content. The students who arrive to my 3rd grade classroom from her 2nd grade classroom are often lacking in basic skills, both mathematical and language. I have students in my classroom who arrived in 3rd grade immersion without the capability of asking permission to leave the room to use the restroom and without the capability of adding 1 digit numbers. This teacher, who voluntarily teaches in the immersion program, constantly uses resources...