my pink life, mi vida rosada

thankful for my family. snuggled up in a blanket on the couch at the beach. learning some interesting family history from about 8 generations back. waiting for sweet hubby to wake up. checking out sewing machine deals online. drooling over silhouette cutters. considering working on the awful puzzle we started at memorial day weekend and haven't been able to finish all summer and fall (at the beach, so not always available). wishing I had the pictures from last night's walk on the beach at sunset to share. excited about the boat parade we're planning to watch tonight. avoiding doing work for the class I'm taking. filling up on pumpkin pie.

So as the whole world knows by now, I'm in a rocky place where my faith is concerned. I want to have great hope and put all of my trust in the Lord, but over and over so far my greatest desire seems out of reach. In my quest for some sort of balance, I've begun to write my prayers down, instead of simply praying them in my head. (This is in addition to talking to good friends, my godmother, my counselor, my sweet hubby, running on a semi-regular basis, etc.) It has been good for me, so far, because it is forcing me to take the time to slow down and focus and to really be intentional about trying to be thankful, even when I don't really feel thankful. It is forcing me to recognize feelings and questions that I have about this whole infertility experience that before I hadn't been able to fully form or fully recognize. It is also forcing me to be more open to hearing God's response -- this taking time to really pay attention also gives me a time and place wh...

1. I finished my 8k race this morning in 56 minutes. I was surprised to be able to run the whole thing, even if I went super slow. This also means that I only have one more race to go in order to meet my 2012 New Year's Resolution Goal of running a race every month. I'm pretty excited to be 11/12 of the way there! Thanks to sweet hubby for taking this little picture after I got home. 2. I had an HSG on Thursday, which was surprisingly painful but apparently had a good result -- no blockages or anything. So it's back to waiting and not knowing why I haven't been able to get pregnant yet. 3. There are two school days before Thanksgiving, and I am probably more excited about the break than my students are. 4. I'm making the pioneer woman's cinnamon rolls for our UMW bakesale at church tomorrow. It's always tempting to eat them all and not save any for the bakesale. 5. Wait Wait Don't Tell Me is hilarious. 6. I just finished reading the bo...

And only 6 more school days until the first of the breaks -- Thanksgiving break! One of my absolute FAVORITES!!! I'm so excited to spend time with my family. We'll have dinner with about 35 other aunts/uncles/cousins and then take a long walk in the country. We'll eat dinner in the afternoon and snack all day and then have supper before we leave, too. We'll play games and talk and laugh and chase the little ones around and Uncle Richard will fall asleep in front of the TV. Or in the middle of a conversation. (He has narcolepsy, which we didn't know until a few years ago -- it was a great revelation. Now he takes medicine before all family gatherings, which helps him stay awake for all of the fun!). I'm trying to think positive and get excited about the family time coming up -- it's helping me get through the trying days at school....mondays. And all the other days, too!

definitely going to vote today. looking forward to hanging out with my godmama for a little bit today, and letting her give me insight about what I should do with infertility treatment and faith. listening to mumford & sons. and the cat purring. up early on a day with no school, but that's ok. glad that sweet hubby still has to work today, since we just took a big financial hit. trying really hard to give up my worries to God and trust that he will provide (financially and family wise). annoyed by my messy house. glad I went for a run yesterday, when it was 20 degrees warmer and so much less grey outside. ready to register sweet hubby for a full load of classes this spring, after his part time student status this fall. hopeful that one day he will actually graduate and get a job he loves. full of chai tea from the dutch store in the mountains -- yum. deciding which apple dessert to make with the many apples we still have from picking apples a few weeks a...

(No, not x-rated, you're looking in the wrong place.) I was supposed to go on a college church retreat this weekend. And I didn't. I was very "unresponsible" and made the best decision for me -- not to go. I would have loved spending time in the mountains. I would have loved getting to know some of the students a little bit better. I would have loved spending time taking in God's majesty while watching the sun rise or set over the lake, singing songs of praise, hiking, walking the labyrinth, or sitting in a rocking chair on the front porch. Except that this weekend, I wouldn't have loved any of those things. They would have been a burden to me. And a church retreat? I'm fairly certain that it is not supposed to feel like a burden, but more like a blessing. When sweet hubby's good friend called me and texted me to see if he could ride with me, I said no. I couldn't handle the idea of talking to this man for three hours in the car af...